Bleh, Bleh, Bleh...

Well yesterday was a great day...i got home and Jamison was there(wut a cutie!) so i hung out him and Pam( she was there talkin to mom of course), and had to change a coupple diapers for pam cuz of her wicked gag reflex. She stayed for a while and then when supper was done she went home to get Jamison some cheetos(that kid's crazy for cheetos i tell ya). and then Dad tells us that Grams is in the ICU in St. Paul and will probly die before the end of Friday....oh great, that's comforting. so dad left for minnesota at 4:30 this morning and woke me up so he could get the blanket that i made for her...and i haven't been back to sleep since. I keep getting all teary eyed bcuz all i can think about is how bad Dad must feel. See, for those of you who dont know, my dad and 2 of his brothers didnt grow up with their parents, they grew up with their mom's parents. My dad and Trent and Tye all grew up with Grams and Grampa(he died before i was born). And now we find out that she's dying. i remember when Gramma Karen died how much dad and all my uncles cried...and that was their step mom. i loved my gramma karen sooo much and i still miss her. and dad and trent and tye all bawled for like 2 days straight. so i dont even wanna think about Grams dying bcuz..i know it would hurt my dad and uncles too much. and i think i'm being totally selfish right now. i just dont think i could handle watching the 3 of them break down like that again..i mean, really....you arent supposed to see big guys like that cry (if you know wut my dad looks like...tye looks like him,but an inch shorter, and trent is an inch taller than dad..they could almost pass for triplets). And then you bring back all my dad's aunts and my dad's mom and get all of them crying..i just dont even wanna deal with it. I'm scared tho..i mean...what if she actually dies? the woman has outlived her husband, 2 of her children, most of her friends, and i think 2 grand kids. she can't die! she's supposed to outlive us all. i just hope that if she does pass on today that dad made it to minnesota in time to say good bye to her. so, i'm off to sleep in the library, as i am quite tired. bye.
~Me~